Children and Dancing II

Years later, I started to work with my daughters, then aged 14, 8, and 6 on a belly dance routine for Pagan Pride Day (http://www.mainepaganprideday.org), which was to be the debut performance of our dance troupe, Luna Wind (www.lunawind.org). I had a piece already choreographed and the girls knew many traditional steps just from mimicking me around the house.

The first day that I was set to do some serious teaching with them, I had the dance choreography written out and the steps highlighted that were new. Due to Deirdre’s age, I had kept the dance simple.

We pushed the living furniture to the sides and got down to business.

“I want to go outside,” Deirdre said after about three seconds of work.

“Let’s get the opening down first.” I said cheerfully.

“I want to go out now.” Deirdre crossed her arms over her chest and stared at me. Deirdre has a way about her that can frighten people. She had just grown out of her feral child stage. I’m not joking. Deirdre was sent home from preschool five times in the first two weeks for fighting. She bit, swore, pulled her hair, hissed, snarled, and refused to wear clothing.

At any given moment, she could be found crawling around the apartment in her underwear cursing anyone who dared to approach her. I called her Smeagle in my mind because she was bone skinny with very little hair and eyes that glowed iridescent. And she obsessed about shiny things. She had matured a lot since starting school, but I was always nervous that she would revert like she did after my divorce when she was four.

I smiled at Deirdre and looked to Camille and Claudia to help me. Claudia wouldn’t catch my eye. I think she wanted to be done with practice too. I’m not sure if she even wanted to perform with us. High school has a way of turning the nicest child into the Kraken. Camille shot a loving glance back at me. Good ole Camille could always be depended upon to be dedicated to me.

“From the top.”

“I want to go out.”

“After we get this part down.” I looked at Claudia, “Then you can all do what you want for the rest of the afternoon.” I was anxious too because Sam, then five months, was napping.

“I want to stay with you until we get it right.” Camille batted her dark lashes at me.

I smiled at her encouragingly even though my stomach was in a knot. Sappy sweetness crawls under my skin in much the same way that obstinacy does, which makes Camille and Deirdre quite the deadly combination. Ignoring Deirdre’s whimpering, I made my way to the computer and tapped the play arrow on I-Tunes. Elaine Silver’s “Calling All Directions” (http://www.elainesilver.com) swirled through the air.

I wrapped my veil around me and motioned for the others to line up behind me. We began our intro-walk to our places and started our first spin. Once turned around, I realized Deirdre was not with me. She stood off to the side, her veil covering her head, arms crossed.

“Deirdre,” I snapped. My head felt hot and my body ached.

“What?” Her slender arms snaked out from the pink silk.

“If we get just the beginning finished, we’ll be that much closer to the end.”

“I don’t want.”

“You don’t want to what?” I lowered my veil so that it draped behind me, rippling like the ocean.

“I already know what to do.” Deirdre turned around, her orange hair shimmering gold under the fabric.

“Then show me.” I spun around and collapsed into the computer chair. I hit the keys harder than I meant to and the music started over. I rolled around and gestured for Deirdre to begin. And she did, dancing every step perfect right up to where we had left off.

The phone rang and Claudia grabbed it, retreating quickly to her bedroom just as Sam began to scream. Camille walked over and leaned into me. “I love you,” she whispered.

“Can I go out?” Deirdre let her sunflower colored veil drop to the ground.